Celebrities Aren’t Our Friends: A Call to Unfollow the Illusion.
Social media has allowed celebrities to BUILD a more intimate relationship with the public than ever before.
Platforms like Instagram and TikTok provide us with an open window into the lives of celebrities like Hailey Bieber or the Kardashians, at all times.
Their meticulously documented daily routines and ‘relatable’ content can create a sense of friendship, blurring the lines between celebrity life, and the reality for most of us. It can leave us feeling like they are ‘one of us’, a legit friend (after all, we’ve invested a tonne of emotional energy into every detail of their lives). However, this feeling of companionship is not as it seems.
In fact, it is a phenomenon called parasocial relationships, where one person invests emotional energy, interest, and time in a one-sided connection, while the other, the celebrity, remains completely unaware.
These types of relationships can interfere with a person’s real-life relationship; with themselves, others and the world around them. Over time, the unilateral nature of parasocial relationships can lead people to feel unfulfilled and serve as a distraction from real life.
That’s because so many of us sacrifice our time, energy and appreciation of our own beauty by comparing ourselves to these seemingly relatable celebrities. But the truth is that they are far from relatable.
When headlines scream about Hailey Bieber spending $768 on her latest skin-care routine, it forces us to ask the question: are we inadvertently damaging our self-esteem by trying to emulate celebrities’ unattainable lifestyles as if they’re our friends?
And the answer is a resounding yes.
Hailey Bieber, like numerous other A-listers, lives a life that is drastically different from the struggles of the average person. While $768 on skincare may seem a mere footnote in her expenses, for most of us, it represents a significant investment, and completely out of our means.
Such a discrepancy between celebrity standards and our own reality can have a very real impact on people’s mental health and can fuel feelings of inadequacy. Especially when they are acting like they are ‘just like us’. We begin to doubt our own worth and beauty when we witness celebrities flaunting their thousand-dollar skincare routines, their flawless skin, and their extravagant lifestyles, while we struggle to keep pace. It’s easy to fall into the trap of believing we have to be just like them, to be happy, beautiful and successful.
Can we really GRW celebrities once we see the price tag of their 12 step skincare routine?
Over time, this distortion can leave us feeling, well, pretty miserable.
So, what can we do to gain some perspective, and liberate ourselves from the beauty trap perpetuated by social media and celebrity culture?
Here are a few steps to consider:
Recognize the Illusion:
First and foremost, we must acknowledge that celebrities are not our friends. They are famous people whose lives are not attainable for the average person, even if their social media is trying to make them feel relatable (after we feel close to them, they’ll usually try and sell us something, have you noticed?). Admire them by all means, by from afar. And in small doses.
Spend time getting clear and focussing on your own values:
Amidst the chaos of external influence, it’s important to take time to reconnect to our inner self. What is truly important to you in life? What do you want to achieve and experience? Once you have a better understanding of your own values, you can start to prioritize them and make choices that are aligned with them. And spend less time scrolling.
Unfollow Unhealthy Influencers:
Assess your social media feeds and unfollow accounts that promote unrealistic beauty ideals or unattainable lifestyles that only make you feel down. Surround yourself with content that encourages individuality, and body positivity, and whose influence is genuinely uplifts you.
MAKE NEW FRIENDS (IRL):
There is nothing that compares to spending time and making meaningful connections with people in real life. In this digital age, its more important than ever to make real human connections. Try signing up for a new class, or make a point of meeting your friends more often, or be open to meeting more people. We know, making new friends takes time and effort, but it's worth it. Strong social connections can boost your mood, reduce stress, and improve your overall health and well-being. And probably help get you off your phone.
Be a decent person, to yourself:
Remember, you do not need flawless skin, the latest designer gear or an Instagram ‘perfect’ grid to be worthy of love, respect or beauty. You are beautiful the way you are. Try practising some self-compassion and acceptance to truly believe this.
the bottom line
Celebrities are famous individuals, not our friends. While we can admire their talents, it is important to remember that they are often paid to endorse products and services and have access to resources and lifestyles far different from our own.
Whilst the allure of celebrity culture may persist, we have the power to choose how we engage with it. We can choose to follow accounts that promote positive values and body image, and we can choose to focus on our own unique beauty and worth.
And remember, you don't need $768 worth of products to look or feel beautiful. You are inherently beautiful, and there is absolutely no shame in using a pot of Nivea.
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